crystal_dream81

>FRIENDS ONLY JOURNAL.< 
Only entries before May 21, 2010 will remain viewable to public. 

Geewhiz, I was reading my gmail account and came across this message written by my second brother:

"DON'T WORRY SIS YOU'LL NEVER BE LIKE ME WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE.

Did so much more nonsense that you can ever imagine. Be yourself =D"

And a previous message written by Grace oneechan in January.....

"My dear sister, there is nothing that you need to cry about... As I have spoken to you yesterday.. It is NOT the end of the world.. It is NOT as bad as what I have gone through.. Pull yourself together and focus on the rest of your subjects kays?? =)"

I have just arrived home from a service that is pretty relevant to the situation the vast majority of us are in right now, that is our ongoing or upcoming examinations! However, the arrangement of the WEB service was different from the normal ones I had for the past one year. We faced one side of the chapel rather than the stage, although we rearranged the seats into the rightful format near the end of the service. 

"What is my own secret to success in life?" I asked myself this question. This may be a question that is seemingly redundant to anyone, but here, God can be an asset! 1 Samuel 18 was used as the devotional passage, and we saw how David kept his faith and focus onto God in spite of Saul's evil intentions to get rid of him as well as distractions posed onto him! We need to stay focused in battle (or in the case, our exams!) in spite of threats (from the bad guys who may compromise our faith!) We need to press on harder as much as possible while God helps us get out the chaos we are in! When distractions tempt us, will we go against our faith? Doing what God commands us to do, is no piece of cake. Drift away from God, and we will not be faithful towards him! There is NO SHORTCUT OR EASY WAY OUT. Likewise, in the case of David, he served God and eventually obtained success the hard way! Are "instant" ways of success too good to be true?

This brings me, Kat Chan, the main speaker, prayed for the people who were presently feeling stressed or had been pressured by their peers or families. I was one of them, and hence I raised both my arms as a symbol of surrender. Meanwhile, a flashback of Mr Dominic Lim's speech the previous week and my pre-exam misdeeds began to swim around in my head, making me cry as I was listening to Kat Chan's words.

Was my academic championship pretty much an elusive one for the past four years? Still recalling that trophies and grades do not define one's persona, did I cling onto His faith during the period of my exams, even before I reconverted to Christianity last year? I am nonetheless grateful that God still did not give up on me, even though I was still distracted by computer games. 

[But let's recall my first session with the upper secondary WG last year. Here's what I derived:

"Practically everyone is juggling over many things, ranging from school to tuition classes, external community activities and work. This can also include our stress, which can be detrimental. Hence, we can seek God for help. Referring to Matthew 11:25 to 30, it is stated that we deserve rest if we are burdened or weary. And with reference to my senior WG meeting the week before last week, faith therefore won't suffice but we must get proper rest and manage our time well. It's just a matter of responsibility."]

Precisely, is God missing in my life, inclusive of studies and friendships? Remember, God should not be placed at the bottom end of our priority list! There, we gathered to form a prayer circle and began to pray for one another for each other's academics before repenting on our own. While everyone was praying, including myself, I felt that deja vu, once again! It wasn't annoying, honestly, though I felt it coming into my head. This was a reminder of a similar prayer that Grace oneechan had prayed for me in early May last year! (click here for full details about it) The wisdom, the sense of peacefulness and easiness in our minds and the need for God's guidance and presence throughout the exam period! We were also told that God, as well as our brothers and sisters in Christ would also be with us, even if they may not be with us in person that often! Stop taking matters into your own hands, especially in a situation like this. Let God do the rest as you come before Him. The SA1 is not the end of the world, young lady.

The service ended on a high note, with upbeat songs Take it All and One Way being played by the worship team, and in contrast to the solemn atmosphere that filled the chapel during Kat's preaching. Most of us shelved our fears aside as we trusted God that those struggles of ours would be overcome by His faith. (Amen!)

If you had not failed, you would not have lived.

There may be many events that would give me a certain impact in my life, such as my last year's SYF Gold With Honours for Chinese Dance or my academic achievements in secondary school. However, the one which I found the most crucial and worth reflecting on is definitely last year's Easter Outreach, Get Alive. The Get Alive was a turning point where I rededicated my life to Christ, being spiritually blind after leaving childcare at primary four. (fourth grade) Since the Easter outreach, I slowly became curious about life in my church as well as the things that were not taught in my childcare, not to mention having my Christianity thoughts resurrected. Admittedly, the conversion to Christianity was not a smooth one for me, but eventually, I learnt that I could seek God in times of need, twenty-four hours a day. 

Love is a song.
Love is a story.
Love is a necessity.
Love is a chain of emotions.
Love is a craving.
Love is a form of acceptance.
Love is an act of sacrifice.
Love is about (genuine) compassion and care (as what I wrote on the wall!)
Love is the free gift of eternal life given by God!
Love IS GOD!!!
God IS LOVE!!! <3

(If I've misspelled anyone's name, please let me know alright?)
A Blessed Easter Sunday to all! <3 Happy birthday Mr Ng!!!

Easter Outreach was undoubtedly awesome yesterday (in fact better than last year's Get Alive), but it would have been a full blast if it wasn't for the absence of my onee-chan, who was still in JB at that time, as well as my friends who I've invited but pulled out at the last minute. But, that's not the whole point of the story.

( Read more... )

To all those who I've invited but declined at the last minute, I'm really sorry, you've missed out a great message on God's love as well as all the fun....

Okay, good question. As an evangelized Christian, I've now realized that God actually has a destiny for me, whether it is soothing to my ego or not. I remembered attending a Christmas outreach titled "Destiny's Child" and thought about this question following a message from the pastor, "What are we destined for?" But previously, when I was still spiritually blind to Christianity, I had my own destinies of free will, some of which I've realized, were apparently not pleasing to God's eyes!

As my church's Easter Outreach approaches, one of my destinies is to see my friends receive Christ in their lives, as the importance of discipleship is reinforced time and again. A spiritual emergency is occurring! Spreading the word of God (or, shall I say Gospel) to people is a need! 

Just this afternoon, I finally got myself together with my fellow seniors for a WG meeting, having not attended WG for ages. (!) In this WG session, Matt asked us this question, "What are you going to do next?" With of the exception of me (who is taking Os this year), most of my seniors may have just received their A-level results earlier this month, or for the current first year JC and poly students, their O-level results in January. There, we contemplated on what we wanted to do as part of our ideal careers, or for my case, my choices on my post-secondary education.
( For the xth time, proceed here, NOT! )

[This post focuses on my plans to join next year's Chingay.]

Following the successful pull-through of the actual Chingay parade weeks ago, I took an oath and promised to myself that I would join Chingay 2011 in my ballet group even though I would have "graduated" from the RAD syllabus by then. However, it was only recently that I changed my mind and not join next year's Chingay. This was even though I had this prediction that the first rehearsal would be after my O-levels. Why?

( the reason why. )